My Anxiety


I see a lot of posts about peoples Anxiety and I wanted to share mine because I find every person is different and as cliché as it sounds, every time I read another post about it I feel less and less alone. I feel like I have come to accept how I feel now and I find talking about it refreshing in a way. I am very lucky in the sense that I am not as badly affected as some people and I have a wonderful support system in my boyfriend who makes everything ten times better, this doesn’t however mean I don’t have really bad days.

 

I was diagnosed with Anxiety in March/April time I believe but I had been experiencing symptoms for probably 6-8 months beforehand. I was trying my hardest to kind of, work it out on my own and in all honesty, I knew what was going on. I was finding things really difficult and felt scared most of the time and couldn’t work it out on my own so I visited the doctors and they put me on medication. I came off the medication not long after because it really wasn’t for me. I know that some people rely on it but after a while I decided to stop the medication as it wasn’t making much difference so I came off it myself. I have been back to the doctors to discuss different medication but they don’t seem to want to try that so I am content at the moment with no medication and trying to work through it on my own.

 

I find that making sure I plan things out and take time for myself usually helps, doing things such as taking long baths, reading and spending time with people I am comfortable with in a comfortable setting helps me a lot. I find that talking my fears also helps but only when I am with someone I trust completely. I am really lucky in the sense that my boyfriend is very understanding and although there have been hiccups (which is understandable in my eyes because it is a lot of pressure to be there for someone), he is the one I turn to for most things and along with that my best friend and my cousin are very understanding also and are there for me when I need them.

 

I do have days where I want to cry all day and feel like it isn’t fair, some days I feel on top of the world. I have weeks and weeks where I feel like I can’t do anything and the next thing I know I’ll be realizing I haven’t had a panic attack in a week. Things are up and down, I get anxious over very little things but I have come to accept that things are probably always going to be this way and if they are, I am ok with that.

 

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